You are so precious.

When I held you.... it was a moment of perfection

And because of you I am complete.

The Legacy of a Martyr

Described as one of the greatest and most influential African Americans in history, February 21 2012 marked the 47th anniversary of Al Hajj Maalik Al Shabbaaz’s death, when he was shot to death in Harlem, New York, in 1965.

This man, eminently known as Malcolm X, represents the struggles our youth face everyday. That is,   the struggle to have their voice heard in an increasingly unequal and unjust world, and the struggle to seek the truth and implement it in their life without being looked down upon by society.

Malcolm X struggled for decades until he found himself. He lived and died in a struggle but was and still is an inspiration to millions worldwide.

This man witnessed it all... Born in 1925, he watched as his family home burned to the ground and at the age of 6 was orphaned when his father was murdered.

Malcolm X served six years in prison where he converted to the Nation of Islam and then became one of the Nation’s most influential ministers after his release. For so many years he advocated for the hatred of whites and was famously known for his slogan ‘black is beautiful’ as he promoted Black Nationalism and power.

But gone were the days where white people were considered evil by Malcolm when he made a trip to the Holy City of Makkah in 1964. It was here where he learnt and embraced the true essence and beauty of Islam and realised that no race or colour is superior to another. It is here where he discovered the meaning of equality, brotherhood and the solution to racism.

Malcolm X travelled through the East and West and finally found the peace of mind and heart he was looking for in Islam. He referred to Islam as “the fountain of truth, love, peace and brotherhood’.

He went on to spread the message of authentic Islam back home and ended up receiving one of the greatest forms of honour any American citizen could imagine obtaining; he was commemorated on a United States postal stamp. However, he was assassinated at the age of 40 as he delivered a speech in New York.

Indeed, if you were to become familiar with the history of this man, you will undoubtedly be touched and left in admiration. You will push aside any weakness you may have and, as he did, find strength to strive for the peace and equality our world and humanity so sadly lacks.

His message to us and future generations was clear. Stand firm for what you believe in and demand your rights for no man is superior to another.

His story resonates in the minds and hearts of historians, scholars, Muslims, non Muslims, the young and old. His life is a lesson to all.

He was a man with a profound legacy and he inspired a great number of people to leave a corrupt Nation of Islam belief system and believe in the foundations of the true Islam and the belief in the One True God. He went against the world even when he knew his life was at risk. His faith was unshakable.

This was the message of our dear Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). In turn, it was the message spread by Malcolm and it is the message we should live by every day.

So much has been happening in our world, from Muslim prisoners being force fed in Guantanamo, to outrage and turmoil in the Muslim World, and to our very own Australia getting in on the action with the closing of the doors on people seeking asylum.

Of course, this state of our World needs no introduction. It seems like not much happiness is going on and unfortunately, it seems to get crueller and crueller by the day.

On a 'happier' note though, our pains seemed to have been pushed aside with the birth of the Royal Baby not long ago.

At not even an hour old, that baby made headlines worldwide and still continues to do so.

The level of importance the media and the world allocate to stories such as the royal baby is beyond a joke. While so much tragedy is occurring, it is obvious that this royal blooded baby's life is of greater significance than the blood of those thousands of people who are dying every day from starvation, persecution and torture.

Civilisation as we know it will not go on if tragedies like this continue. Our world is being destroyed before our eyes and our brothers and sisters are being slaughtered in every corner of the globe.

We are reminded over and over again with what is happening but feel that we are too far away to do anything.

Wrong. We are missing the point. It is not just about Syria or Egypt or Burma or Palestine anymore. ‘Doing our part’ is not just about sending some charity and clothes their way. We do not realise that this humiliation is a reflection of our failure as a nation. Allah Subhanaahu wa Ta’aalah said in the holy Qur’an:

 Verily Allah will never change the condition of a people until they change themselves"

(13:11)

We, as Muslims, cannot sit back and presume everything will get better because it won’t.

The  Muslim Nation is like a body. When one part hurts the rest of the body feels it. It does not look like this is happening. We are clearly in a lot of trouble and perhaps these atrocities and the humiliation of Muslims are signs telling us to wake up. So, enough with these ridiculous corruption-filled weddings. Enough with these all-nighter card and shisha sessions. Enough with the hatred, jealousy and resentment towards one another. Is this the way of life Muhammad (peace be upon him) preached? Is this how you think the dignity and honour of Islam will be restored?  

Brothers and sisters, focus on what is important and what should be your priority. Bring Islam back to your homes and back into your lives. Live Islam. Spread Islam. Breathe Islam.

Will I See You One Day?

I yearn so badly to see You one day.

A wish for which no amount of gold and silver could ever compensate

So strong a feeling it is in my heart, it burns like a fire...

So intense A prayer, it is greater than any other desire..

I ask: Will the good I have done in my life suffice?

Will my face on That Day be gloomy and grey or lit up so bright?

Or of seeing you, ya Allah, will my eyes be deprived?

Will I be of those who stand beneath Your shade on that remarkable Day?

My heart trembles of fear  when I think of what could be my fate..

And so I bow to You ya Allah and I Prostrate

I pray it is not too late..

So, I ask Ya Rabb, will I see You one day?

I know I deserve neither Your Grace nor Your Paradise

But I will ask for Your forgiveness and mercy till the day I die

So that I may drink from Those pure rivers of wine

And be in the  presence of the most blessed and greatest of mankind

And to wander through Your beautiful  Jannah, so divine..

So weak I am, and merely Your servant made from clay

But so Compassionate You are, so Mighty and so Great.

So, I ask Ya Rabb, Will I see You one day?

"That was the thing. You never got used to it, the idea of someone being gone. Just when you think it's reconciled, accepted, someone points it out to you, and it just hits you all over again, that shocking."
— Sarah Dessen

We Plan, but Allah is the Best of Planners

Allah’s Plans:

Some things are beyond planning. Life doesn’t always turn out as planned.
You don’t plan for a broken heart.
You don’t plan for an autistic child.
You don’t plan to be single forever.
You don’t plan for a lump in your breast. Or a disease. Or broken bones.

You plan to be young forever. You plan to climb the corporate ladder.
You plan to be rich and powerful. You plan to be acclaimed and successful.
You plan to conquer the universe. You plan to fall in love - and be loved forever.
You don’t plan to be sad. You don’t plan to be shattered. You don’t plan to be hurt. You don’t plan to be broke. You don’t plan to be betrayed. You don’t plan to be alone in this world.

Sometimes, if you work hard enough, you can get what you want. But MOST times, what you want and what you get are two different things.

We, mortals, plan. But so does Allah in the heavens. Sometimes, it is difficult to understand Allah’s plans, especially when His plans are not in consonance with ours. Often, when He sends us crisis, we turn to Him in anger.

True, we cannot choose what Allah wishes us to carry, but we can carry it with courage knowing that He will never abandon us nor send something we cannot cope with.

Sometimes, Allah breaks our spirit to save our soul.
Sometimes, He breaks our heart to make us whole.
Sometimes, He allows pain so we can be stronger.
Sometimes, Allah sends us failure so we can be humble.
Sometimes, He allows illness so we can take better care of ourselves.
And sometimes, Allah takes everything away from us so we can learn the value of everything He gave us.

Make plans, but understand that we live only by Allah’s grace, His Fadhal(favour) and His Rahma (mercy)..

From: Unknown Source

The Veil of Faith

If you cannot see beyond my headscarf, that I am a human being... That I have a mind... A heart... and a soul... Then something is wrong with your intellect and wisdom.

I am not unliberated... I am not uneducated nor am I oppressed.

I am not forced to dress in this way. I do this because I have chosen this way of life for myself & I do this out of love for God.

It brings me happiness, comfort & a connection with my Creator that you may never truly understand.

Why is this so hard to comprehend?

All days are nights to see till I see thee...

When most I wink, then do mine eyes best see,
For all the day they view things unrespected;
But when I sleep, in dreams they look on thee,
And darkly bright are bright in dark directed.
Then thou, whose shadow shadows doth make bright,
How would thy shadow's form form happy show
To the clear day with thy much clearer light,
When to unseeing eyes thy shade shines so!
How would, I say, mine eyes be blessed made
By looking on thee in the living day,
When in dead night thy fair imperfect shade
Through heavy sleep on sightless eyes doth stay

 All days are nights to see till I see thee,
And nights bright days when dreams do show thee to me.

~William Shakespeare, "Sonnet XLIII" ~

Success Comes with Trying

"I don't believe in failure, because simply by saying you've failed, you've admitted you attempted. And anyone who attempts is not a failure. Those who truly fail in my eyes are the ones who never try at all. The ones who sit on the couch and whine and moan and wait for the world to change for them."

— Sarah Dessen

Have You Ever?

Have you ever met a person that fulfilled you deep inside? Someone who's never failed you and stands, no matter what, always by your side. Someone who gives from their heart, who brings sunshine all around... Always smiling and laughing, never bringing you down. Have you ever watched a sunset, across the ocean shore...? And been filled with love and peace, never needing more? Have you ever listened to the wind, Blowing restlessly through the night...And allowed yourself to fly away, Never returning into sight? Have you ever been in love with a person so bad, and wanted nothing more, than to be loved by that person back? Have you ever when I speak to you, seen the light in my eyes, so vibant and bright? If you ever hear my heart beat, you would know how dear you are in my life. I wonder… will you ever be with me? Will you ever be mine? Will you love me how I love you? And will you care if you ever saw me cry? Have you ever thought of how to thank the one you love? And if you have, did you believe your thanks would be enough? Have you showed your darling everything that is beautiful? And everything that she would like? Have you told her everything that is delightful? And everything that is right? Should you worry about my love for you? Do you ever ask yourself that? Don’t worry the words “I Love You” will never be taken back. Now just one more thing I would like to make clear, and that is I hope my love you will never doubt nor fear… I pray you never do my dear. If that is so, then let me know, so I can make your fears disappear. One day you will find out, just how very much I love you and how I would love you to be near... Always and forever...

Just Another ‘Vent Your Spleen’ Moment!

Oh the agonies of law! I cannot recall how many times I have told myself to leave law school. But alas, I am still here... counting down the few weeks remaining (inshaAllah). Sometimes I think why do we do all this? Sometimes everything in life feels pointless... Our final destination is the grave, right? So why not just spend every bit of our life in worship and in preparation for that? Instead of wasting 5 years of my life studying law or whatever? Anyway, You get my point.

Allah is by Your Side

Through all your hardship & your pain
Rest assured for Allah is by your side
As you look up at the stars & bow your head down as you pray
Know that Your Lord has blessed you and His favours you cannot deny
You are a Muslim & thus you are blessed indeed
So be sincere to this deen & content with all that Allah has decreed
And as your heart throbs with pain, & your eyes well up with tears
Be Strong, trust Him, & set your heart free from all fears
NEVER forget that Allah is the One that knows all & hears
All you’ve been through, in the past days & years
So know that you will never be alone
For Allah will never leave His true and faithful servant on his own

Time

Time.
Like a Sword.
Is cutting me.
Time.
Rushing past.
Not a second look it gives me.
Time.
So vital.
Yet I fail to see.
Time.
So precious.
Yet I waste perpetually.
Oh how I wish I could only control this sword cutting me.

Where is the Love?

What is it that I just cannot understand? There is something I simply cannot pinpoint?

How could such intense love and intense hurt both coexist in one thing? How could two emotions from two extremes of the spectrum just conflict like that? How can something be so bitter yet so sweet?

How beautiful were the days when everything was sweet and simple? The days of our childhood... when our biggest concern was winning the maths competitions at school and which sport we will be selected for to compete in inter-school sports? Oh how I miss those days when we were all so innocent.

But things change.

Now we are big kids playing in this big world. Once upon a time we dreamt of doing what adults did but little did we know what awaited us. Why grow up? I guess Peter Pan had a point. Why can’t we just climb onto his ship and fly away to Never-never Land? And each of us has our own little Tinker bell to sprinkle fairy dust on us each time we wanted to fly away?

I guess we can only dream. Because this is real life. Now we endure. We endure from Pain. Hurt. Heartbreak. Illness. Depression. Anxiety. And the list goes on. And if we aren’t physically bearing this pain, we suffer as we watch others suffer.

Now we witness the dehumanization of people. We witness the blood of people become cheap because they adhere to a certain faith or come from a different country. Truly sad and extremely disgusting. But neither of these words could ever possibly come close to conveying the true nature of these atrocities committed in the name of global security, freedom and whatever other baloney terms they employ to brainwash us with.

Just Watch those in Palestine and you will understand... Those in Iraq... Those in Chechnya... Those in Bosnia... Afghanistan. Kosovo. The Middle East. Pakistan. Day after day millions are being persecuted in their own land, mothers killed in front of their children. Children killed in front of their parents. Men killed cold-bloodily for defending their right to survive. Defending their right to freedom. Defending their right to live. And they... they just kill. They kill with no heart and no conscience. They know nothing else. Where is the love they speak of? Where is the peace? Where are all these things that our so-called leaders preach about? Yes, actions speak louder than words... but their words are powerless, their words are futile. They proclaim nothing but lie upon lie upon lie.

And so the world continues to wait for a leader to stand up against these pathetic fools. We will continue to pray and wait. A day will come when all these crimes and injustice are paid for. Perhaps not in the Criminal Courts of the world. Yet surely in the Court of the Creator, the Just, the Most High.

So, until justice prevails, and the anguish of this world is exterminated for good, I guess a part of us will continue to yearn for our life in Never-never land, when we knew nothing of the cruelty of this world. And all we did was play with dolls, enjoy fake tea parties, and run around in crazy circles chanting ring-a-ring-o'-rosies.

Hope...

 When nothing matters anymore and you’re greatest companion is solitude, tears become your source of comfort.

As you turn away from the pains of this world, all the bloodshed, the crimes, and the hurt, not even love can bring a smile to your heart…

You feel estranged in the streets you once called home and the nights you sought rest and sleep in once upon a time are now the initiators of tears, loneliness and strong yearning for what you don’t have.

Yet despite how down you feel, as if the earth will open up and swallow you, there will always be that glimmer of hope… that light at the end of the tunnel… that single star shining in the sky… that will bring the smile back to your lips.

Poets

They say the words left unspoken…
They express the emotions which you cannot.
They hold a status of great wisdom…
They are our fathers of poetry
From the greats of the deserts of Arabia…
To the wise of the Palaces of Constantinople…
Narrating the viciousness of battles lost and won of the past,
And depicting the deepest of love…
Their ink does not dry out…
And their poetry lingers forever in the hearts and minds of men.

Forever and Always

There's a feeling in my heart which I just cannot grasp,
Oh how i pray for it to eternally last.
There's a twinkle in his eyes,
So entrancing, so fine,
So beautiful it is to know that he is all mine.
His touch is like a summer breeze,
Oh so soft, and oh so sweet.
His smile so perfect it touches my heart,
His embrace so strong, I never wish to part.
Forever and always is how we'll be,
Forever and always, just him and me.

Good bye

As you Walk away...
a tear
a single tear
Forms,
glistens
and falls.
Taking with it
my words
and my heart.

Goodbye

Words Left Unsaid

The reason why she is writing at this moment she, herself, is uncertain of... 

Some emptiness deep within has roused the need to write... 

For when no person can hear her cry, and no solution can be found... Ink on paper is what she resorts to.

And as she lay awake at  this time, she could not stop thinking of what was.

She lamented over the past where not one thing she had said could've properly conveyed her feelings and thoughts.

She does not know what to write nor what urged her to do so, but what she knows is that she is lost in a sea of shattered dreams, suppressed hopes and stiffled cries...

The ink in her pen, although as abundant as water, is going dry...

Yet, her emotions are still pouring out in an ongoing flood of love, hurt and an attachment she can't seem to let go of...

A tear falls... and others follow...  one after the other...

And as each tear speaks a language of its own,

Each tear drop represents those words left unsaid.

Between the Past and the Future...

Your life in the present moment is in between the past and the future. So what has preceded can be rectified by tawbah (repentance), nadam (regret) and istighfar (seeking Allaah’s forgiveness). And this is something that will neither tire you, nor cause you to toil as you would with strenuous labour. Rather it is an action of the heart. Then as regards the future (then it can be corrected) by withholding yourself from sins. And this abandonment is merely the leaving of something and to be at ease from it. This also is not action of the limbs, which requires you to strive and toil. Rather this is a firm resolve and intention of the heart – which will give rest to your body, heart and thoughts. So as for what has preceded, then you rectify it with repentance. And as for the future – then you rectify it with firm resolve and intention. Neither of these involves any hardship or exertion of the limbs. But then your attention must be directed to your life in the present - the time between two times. If you waste it, then you have wasted the opportunity to be of the fortunate and saved ones. If you look after it, having rectified the two times – what is before and after it, as we have said – then you will be successful and achieve rest, delight and ever-lasting bliss. However, looking after it is harder than that which comes before and after it, since guarding it involves keeping to that which is most befitting and beneficial for your soul, and that which will bring it success and well-being.

[Imam Ibn ul Qayyim al Jawziyyah - al-Fawaa’id, pp 151-152]